Imagine if you will two different scenarios, both involving Knights and Dragons. In the first scenario, a brave and valiant knight is charging into the lair of a dragon to rescue his princess who has been kidnapped and is being held hostage. In the second scenario, imagine the same knight charging into to fight the same dragon. Except his princess has not been captured… she has been killed.
Ask yourself. Who would you rather fight?
I would chose the first knight any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Because depending on the love of the princess, that second knight has nothing to lose and may even welcome death. That makes them a more difficult opponent because they take greater risks to win. That second knight will be hungrier than the first. He will not stop. Nor will he yield, relent or… ahhhh, only two synonyms? I’m losing my perspicacity!
As an alternative scenario, take if you will Darth Vader. Vader is one of the best bad guys in history and people might associate him with evil because he is a bad guy. It is not true. Vader is not evil. Vader is rage. He is someone that has been completely consumed by his rage.
If you want a more chickified version of it, there is a scene in Double Jeopardy where Ashley Judd is out running in the a prison yard in the rain and her two cellies look at her and one says something along the lines of, “That girl is running on pure hate.”
I think three examples are probably enough. Anyway, my dad often tells me that harboring hate is bad for the soul. It is something that can destroy you. And I think for the most part, in most instances, this can be true. But remember the knight from the first scenario? Rage can also be a fuel. It can keep you motivated and push you to limits you never thought possible.
The only drawback I can think of is that once you reach your destination, I have to often wonder how you feel with all of your energy spent. Now I know all the members of the Foley Nation are wondering. Perhaps you have come here by way of a certain Facebook posting. And I know what you must be thinking to yourself that I am the last person that should be writing about being a fountain of rage.
Obviously there has to be some event that facilitated this Lewis Black style tirade.
I have jockeyed and maneuvered myself into the absolute best position with my current 9-to-5 job. I have cut back to a part-time position to help shoulder the load of the house and the kids and allow me more productivity with my writing. Amy’s new job basically guarantees that her job takes priority and she has been after me to quit entirely.
However, I love my boss and I love 95% of the people I work with. Most of these people are in my Facebook friends and I genuinely like them. I am afraid of the psychological effects that may happen to me if I retreat into writing full time. Since my weekend poker game has fallen apart, this pretty much guarantees that I begin having only email relationships with people and I become crazy hermit guy with a better than average chance that I begin to perceive World of Warcraft as a reality.
Nobody wants that.
So, I should be enjoying my part time job. I should be using it as an outlet to get me out of the house and into the real world where I can have real life conversations with real life people. It should be ideal.
But my job has changed. The company that I work for has changed. They seem to have become obsessed with rules and regulations and writing employees up for infractions instead of being the “best place to work” as they like to say in their slogans. And one guy in particular is the problem.
He is an upper level management that I absolutely cannot stand. I literally loathe his very presence. He is condescending. He walks around as if he is high and mighty and better than the lowly employees that actually make the company function. I have no illusions that a nutless monkey could do my job but companies need to realize that good employees are hard to come by. And given the cavalcade of all-stars that I have outlasted should be an indication of just how valuable a good employee is. Yet all these new rules and regulations and this freakin’ c**ksucker has me tempted to throw away a five year relationship.
Granted, I may only see this prick a few handful of times a year but it is just that this jerkstore is in a position of management… it makes me frustrated that this is the type of manager that I have to deal with. If he is the representative of the company, this is clearly not a company that I want to work for…
So, I am at a crossroads. I could give it all up and risk a loss of income (such as it is) and insanity due to isolationism or I could gut it out just keep my head down and power through while loathing this individual with every fiber of my being but only suffer him a few handful of times a year. And if I continue to suffer this d-bag, I risk letting rage consume my soul. Is it worth it? Should I just bail out and call it a career? Why suffer fools for a part time paycheck? I make more money writing comic books anyway and I have NEVER had a bad day when I get to write my books. I don’t need an alarm clock when it is comic book writing day.
I was furious today. I mean shaking with rage. So I went to my boss and quit. I was going to be a man. I was not going to walk out. I said I would give him my two weeks. And the worst part of it, Dave completely understood why I was quitting. I was quitting because the system had failed me and I refused to let it bring me down.
But then I thought about my friends I would be leaving and the relationships I would be losing… and I unrang the bell. I am going to gut it out through the weekend, take full stock of my future and decide where to go from here.
Maybe I should just crack open a beer at the prep area while talking on my cellphone and smoking a cigarette. Surely, they would have to fire me. Have them make the decision for me, right? And for those that truly know me, I want you to think about that last statement. I just mentioned a possibility of me smoking. So I must be between a rock and a hard place.
Time will tell. It sure would be easier if I just hated the people I worked with….
Ask yourself. Who would you rather fight?
I would chose the first knight any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Because depending on the love of the princess, that second knight has nothing to lose and may even welcome death. That makes them a more difficult opponent because they take greater risks to win. That second knight will be hungrier than the first. He will not stop. Nor will he yield, relent or… ahhhh, only two synonyms? I’m losing my perspicacity!
As an alternative scenario, take if you will Darth Vader. Vader is one of the best bad guys in history and people might associate him with evil because he is a bad guy. It is not true. Vader is not evil. Vader is rage. He is someone that has been completely consumed by his rage.
If you want a more chickified version of it, there is a scene in Double Jeopardy where Ashley Judd is out running in the a prison yard in the rain and her two cellies look at her and one says something along the lines of, “That girl is running on pure hate.”
I think three examples are probably enough. Anyway, my dad often tells me that harboring hate is bad for the soul. It is something that can destroy you. And I think for the most part, in most instances, this can be true. But remember the knight from the first scenario? Rage can also be a fuel. It can keep you motivated and push you to limits you never thought possible.
The only drawback I can think of is that once you reach your destination, I have to often wonder how you feel with all of your energy spent. Now I know all the members of the Foley Nation are wondering. Perhaps you have come here by way of a certain Facebook posting. And I know what you must be thinking to yourself that I am the last person that should be writing about being a fountain of rage.
Obviously there has to be some event that facilitated this Lewis Black style tirade.
I have jockeyed and maneuvered myself into the absolute best position with my current 9-to-5 job. I have cut back to a part-time position to help shoulder the load of the house and the kids and allow me more productivity with my writing. Amy’s new job basically guarantees that her job takes priority and she has been after me to quit entirely.
However, I love my boss and I love 95% of the people I work with. Most of these people are in my Facebook friends and I genuinely like them. I am afraid of the psychological effects that may happen to me if I retreat into writing full time. Since my weekend poker game has fallen apart, this pretty much guarantees that I begin having only email relationships with people and I become crazy hermit guy with a better than average chance that I begin to perceive World of Warcraft as a reality.
Nobody wants that.
So, I should be enjoying my part time job. I should be using it as an outlet to get me out of the house and into the real world where I can have real life conversations with real life people. It should be ideal.
But my job has changed. The company that I work for has changed. They seem to have become obsessed with rules and regulations and writing employees up for infractions instead of being the “best place to work” as they like to say in their slogans. And one guy in particular is the problem.
He is an upper level management that I absolutely cannot stand. I literally loathe his very presence. He is condescending. He walks around as if he is high and mighty and better than the lowly employees that actually make the company function. I have no illusions that a nutless monkey could do my job but companies need to realize that good employees are hard to come by. And given the cavalcade of all-stars that I have outlasted should be an indication of just how valuable a good employee is. Yet all these new rules and regulations and this freakin’ c**ksucker has me tempted to throw away a five year relationship.
Granted, I may only see this prick a few handful of times a year but it is just that this jerkstore is in a position of management… it makes me frustrated that this is the type of manager that I have to deal with. If he is the representative of the company, this is clearly not a company that I want to work for…
So, I am at a crossroads. I could give it all up and risk a loss of income (such as it is) and insanity due to isolationism or I could gut it out just keep my head down and power through while loathing this individual with every fiber of my being but only suffer him a few handful of times a year. And if I continue to suffer this d-bag, I risk letting rage consume my soul. Is it worth it? Should I just bail out and call it a career? Why suffer fools for a part time paycheck? I make more money writing comic books anyway and I have NEVER had a bad day when I get to write my books. I don’t need an alarm clock when it is comic book writing day.
I was furious today. I mean shaking with rage. So I went to my boss and quit. I was going to be a man. I was not going to walk out. I said I would give him my two weeks. And the worst part of it, Dave completely understood why I was quitting. I was quitting because the system had failed me and I refused to let it bring me down.
But then I thought about my friends I would be leaving and the relationships I would be losing… and I unrang the bell. I am going to gut it out through the weekend, take full stock of my future and decide where to go from here.
Maybe I should just crack open a beer at the prep area while talking on my cellphone and smoking a cigarette. Surely, they would have to fire me. Have them make the decision for me, right? And for those that truly know me, I want you to think about that last statement. I just mentioned a possibility of me smoking. So I must be between a rock and a hard place.
Time will tell. It sure would be easier if I just hated the people I worked with….
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