Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Taking Some Time for Yourself

It seems like for a least the last year, my life has been about future plans. I’ve been so focused on the future and what is coming next that I have stopped to smell the proverbial roses. I mean, when your biggest treat of the month is purchasing the latest Futurama DVD, clearly there is some joy missing in your life…
I have been struggling with a job that, quite frankly, I don’t like. Don’t get me wrong. It is not 100% percent bad. There is a small clique of people that I really enjoy working with. And strangely, my loyalty is to them more than the store itself.
While I probably should not be posting this, I did a little math over the 4th of July weekend. During that weekend, for an eight-hour shift, I made the store approximately $1808. And for that, they paid me $74.40. Yeah. Kinda disheartening. I don’t care how you slice it. That’s busting ass.
So 4th of July is the biggest weekend of the year. It is a butt kicker. It is long hours with not enough help and not nearly enough time off. It takes a long time to even recover from such madness.
This past Monday, everyone received his or her checks with all the overtime from the 4th. So a small collection of us decided to go out and have some fun. It was well worth it. We all deserved it.
With working full time, and writing between part time and full time, taking care of the kids, taking care of the house, and Amy busy with school, I often feel like there is not enough time for me in the day. It’s pretty darn rough.
And, as is an unfortunate fact of life, it seems like my friend base is starting to wear thin. My poker game has broken up. Weekend game nights have been slowly dissolving. Everyone is getting pulled in different directions. It happens. I know. That’s life, right? Still, I hate it and I cannot find a way to change it…
So with all of this work and responsibility, I have almost become hermit like. My contact with the outside world is becoming limited at best. I don’t go anywhere. I don’t do anything. I watch movies. I watch shows from my DVR. I read my comic books. I collect action figures (which keeps me occupied for about one month and then down for four).
Well, and then there is the money factor. Point of fact is that right now, I don’t have a lot of money to throw around. I’ve limited my comic intake. I quit buying my Original Music Scores from films that I love so much. I quit going to Wal-Mart. I just don’t do a whole lot.
But then here was this overtime check.
So I splurged.
We got a babysitter and I took my wife out on the town for an evening of entertainment. I cannot remember the last time that we have gone out for fun.
We both got dressed up and went and had a fancy meal. By “fancy” I mean that the restaurant didn’t have any clown mascots and the food didn’t come in a Styrofoam containers. (Okay, I know fast food restaurants don’t use Styrofoam anymore but I’m making a point.) So we had a nice meal at T.G.I. Fridays (that’s my current definition of fancy). We went to a bookstore and I snagged her a text for her nursing class and then we met my friends from work for a few drinks… it was at an establishment at 39th and Sheridan and will say no more. If you know, you understand.
When playing football (or any organized sport), there is a certain camaraderie in the locker room that is really unlike anything else. Everyone is all looking in the same direction. Everyone has the same goal. And for that night, everyone’s goal was the same: Thank God the 4th of July holiday is over.
It was an evening with a lot of laughter and smiling until my face hurt. It was an evening where everyone could forget their troubles for an evening and just relax.
Truth be told, I had forgotten what that was like. For an evening, I put my crap job aside. For an evening, I put my comic books aside. For an evening, I put the kids aside.
Now don’t hate me. Don’t send angry comments. Truth is the only ones that would send angry comments are people who don’t have kids. I love my kids and I have given them everything. But for your own sanity, sometimes you have to be reminded that you are an individual.
You need time for yourself. I realize now that you need time to relax. You need time to go out and have fun.
That can be hard when you are living off a crappy income from a crappy job, swimming chest deep in credit card debt, and have little to show at the end of the day, getting away for an evening of fun can be hard. After all, poor people don’t take vacations.
Still, I am hoping to find time to relax once every couple of months. I don’t get to go out and have fun enough. This past Monday was the most fun I have had in a long time. I got to sit beside my lovely wife and I was surrounded by friends who make me laugh. It was a great time for all involved. I just hope I can stretch the rest of my paycheck until August 4th. If I can’t you made read a surprisingly different blog in a few weeks. Still, even if money is a little thin, it was totally worth it.
It really is the little things in life. One good evening of fun with friends can erase months of hardship. So if it has been too long for you, take my advice.
Do yourself a favor. Go out and have some fun…

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