The Los Angeles Times states 63% of American families are now considered dysfunctional. That means we’re the majority. We’re normal. It's the people that had the mom, dad, brother, sister, little white picket fence… Those people are the *freaks*!
Christopher Titus, Titus (2000)
So my wife came home from her Psychology college class last evening and presented a pretty startling fact. The most common type of dysfunctional family in the United States consists of three factors:
1) The parents are alcoholics
2) The father favors the daughter
3) The mother favors the son
The typical reaction to this type of family creates the following:
4) The daughter becomes extremely religious, some to the point of joining a cult to be accepted in something.
5) The son develops a strong sense of morals.
Okay, so looking back on my life…
Christopher Titus, Titus (2000)
So my wife came home from her Psychology college class last evening and presented a pretty startling fact. The most common type of dysfunctional family in the United States consists of three factors:
1) The parents are alcoholics
2) The father favors the daughter
3) The mother favors the son
The typical reaction to this type of family creates the following:
4) The daughter becomes extremely religious, some to the point of joining a cult to be accepted in something.
5) The son develops a strong sense of morals.
Okay, so looking back on my life…
Number 1. Alcoholic is a tad strong term. My mom was a drinker and had a tolerance that rivaled an Irish dockworker. The fact that a 5’2” woman weighing 102 pounds could out drink burly high school boys made her a legend with my graduating class. My dad is not exactly a slouch in the drinking department either.
2. Uh, yep.
3. I think that is a pretty accurate description.
4. Hmm. That statistic is pretty interesting.
5. I don’t know if there is a psychological term for what I have but I often state that I have a “Lancelot Complex.” It is a inherent desire to always do the right thing and if I don’t do the right thing, it eats away at my conscience. There is that little voice in my head that I can’t shake. And I have this problem where I have to have people like me. I can’t stand the thought of people not liking me.
So, let’s do the math here. Carry the one… Denominator…
Wow. Five for five!
When Amy told me about the situation, she was just amazed. It was like the teacher was describing my life to a tee. And when she told me, I was ticking the facts off on my fingers, going, “yep, yep, yep.”
I always like to think that was kind of an “outside the box” type guy. An enigma wrapped in a riddle. Turns out I’m in the majority of the majority… Well, at least amongst the crazies.
Weird stuff…
The Los Angeles Times states 63% of American families are now considered dysfunctional. Good. ‘Cause that means when Armageddon happens, 37% of this population is going to lose their mind. “Oh my God, the world is over!” Us 63%? We’re gonna go, “Hey, there’s nobody watching the Lexus dealership…”
Christopher Titus, Titus (2000)
2. Uh, yep.
3. I think that is a pretty accurate description.
4. Hmm. That statistic is pretty interesting.
5. I don’t know if there is a psychological term for what I have but I often state that I have a “Lancelot Complex.” It is a inherent desire to always do the right thing and if I don’t do the right thing, it eats away at my conscience. There is that little voice in my head that I can’t shake. And I have this problem where I have to have people like me. I can’t stand the thought of people not liking me.
So, let’s do the math here. Carry the one… Denominator…
Wow. Five for five!
When Amy told me about the situation, she was just amazed. It was like the teacher was describing my life to a tee. And when she told me, I was ticking the facts off on my fingers, going, “yep, yep, yep.”
I always like to think that was kind of an “outside the box” type guy. An enigma wrapped in a riddle. Turns out I’m in the majority of the majority… Well, at least amongst the crazies.
Weird stuff…
The Los Angeles Times states 63% of American families are now considered dysfunctional. Good. ‘Cause that means when Armageddon happens, 37% of this population is going to lose their mind. “Oh my God, the world is over!” Us 63%? We’re gonna go, “Hey, there’s nobody watching the Lexus dealership…”
Christopher Titus, Titus (2000)
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